19 years ago

     It was 19 years ago today I lost my Dad. No warning, no signs, no indication, just a phone call and a trip to hospital saying he was gone. Wilbur R. Crago died at 12:32pm on a jobsite, he was 47 years old. For the last 19 years I have toasted him many times on his birthday and the day he left us and many other times. I never really talked about what impact he has had on my life in writing or to many people. Crying a little everyday for the last 19 years is what my emotions have been for this many years. This is a small story about the impact he has had on my life. 

      He taught me how to live and he taught me how to die. He left a legacy that lives on today. The legacy of his wife, kids, and grandkids. His spirit lives in Scott, Laura, Stephanie, and myself. I see it in Josh, Justin, Travis, Will and Ava. Being a Crago to us is a very special meaning of strong, work hard, keep your circle small,  take care of the people you love, along with a bit of stubbornness. Just a little bit of stubborness ;).

       I miss him everyday and wonder what he would look like today? Would he have grey hair? Grey Beard? Would he be building log homes in North Carolina with me? What would he be like with a newborn Ava in his hands. How proud would he be when  Josh graduates from college this spring, or Justin serving this country in the Marines. Or how about Travis going into the military after high school and Will swinging a bat the way he did. Watching his son Scott become so successful as a father and with his company that now he is in charge of two manufacturing plants in Tennessee. His daughter going from a show girl in Las Vegas to New york City chasing her dream as a Radio City Rocket to a very popular and Successful Spinning Instructor where she became so successful that they transfered her to Los Angeles, CA.
         
        As for me the things I miss the most are too many to list. He made buildings things feel like a part of life, not a job. Thats why I have stuck with building for my career. From Mid-Rise Buildings to Log Homes. I so much enjoyed building with him and the commeraterie we had on the jobsite that it still follows me today. I recall the times of getting up early and going to Homer and Maggies for breakfast. Maggie always had a big breakfast for us in Evans City, Pa as if she was cooking for an army. If you left Maggies hungry it was your own fault. Homer was a man that was my Dads best friend and I make it a point to stop by everytime I come home. Everytime I see him I can see his eyes with tears in them and we dont even have to say anything, we just know. Homer tells me everytime I see him that he thinks of my Dad everyday. That makes two of us. My Dad left an impression on so many people that it was very evident at his Funeral. 

         Driving around when I go home to PA I remember why I build. When I was building back then I never thought about how much money I was going to make or what I was going to spend it on, now I realize that the most important part was that I was with Dad. He showed me the importance of loving what you do for your soul and not for the money. Could he have gotten a job at the Armco the local steel mill? He might have but then again would he love it? He built because he loved it and supported his family with the occupation he loved. The small things that I think of what he did for us makes me so  grateful for having him as my father. 

         Growing up around my Parents they helped me realize the importance of helping others out. Whether it is  helping an old lady to her car with groceries or pulling over on the side of the road to help someone change a tire. Dad went out of his way for people to help them out anyway he could. He volunteered at Mt Chestnut Presbyterian church with his many skills. Helping people out is a Crago trait, we are born with it. One of my memories with my children already is a time I was cleaning out my camper. They were two and as I was in the camper both Wil and Ava came in and asked if they could help. Carrying all the bags that I was packing to the garage made me one proud Dad not only for the help but the way they asked to help without me asking them. Over the past couple years their intuition to help me is a trait born in the Crago's. 

         As I look back at the last 19 years without my Dad I realize what a ride I have taken in my life. From packing my bags in 1997 and moving to Charlotte, NC without any job, no place to live, and $600 dollars. He taught me the confidence that if I believed in myself and know that with determination and confidence I can achieve anything. My life has taken me from Charlotte to Hilton Head for a couple years and then back to Charlotte and finally settling in Mooresville after building my own home.   The trip I have had has been challenging and tough. Even though he has not been here to see the ride I know he has been watching over me. Certain times in life I have asked him about what to do and he has shown me the way. Its funny how life has been laid out for me in certain circumstances. 

         One of the best descriptions of my Dad was the poem my Uncle Larry wrote about him and it was read by the minister. Uncle Larry has always been great at writing about a person we lost with the start of his Daughter and then his Dad. This is the peom he wrote.

How do you describe what Will meant to you?

He was a super husband, father of three, and grandfather of two.

He was your friend in need, always there to lend a hand, crack a joke or offer the dinner prayer.

Did you play with him in those backyard ballgames?

When no one could catch him but he always fell down.

He was a competitor extaordinaire

Playing even those games, as though they were for the championship crown.

Do you remember what a good sport he was when he heard the news.

That someone at his wedding, wrote HELP on the bottom of his shoes?

His coffee was always ready, with chili or something in the pot.

Along with a smile for you whether you needed it or not.

He was fearless and agile and living proof. 

Was watching him move when he was shingling a roof.

Once on a roof, he took a spill.

He hit the ground and smiles, as you would expect from Wil.

"Are you Ok" from the roof came a call.

He started to laugh then answered "I'm fine, because I know how to fall"

Perhaps you were on the golf trip with him when his breakfast you thought he sent back.

Then suprisingly on hole no. 6 he took and egg out of his bag and said, "I need a little snack."

We all had great times on the canoe trips he took.

There are so many funny stories to tell, each of us could write a book.

There are so many things to remember about Wil. His sense of humor, his Bubbling personality, his bacon and eggs and especially the legendary buck propped on Lenny's Hill. 

Yes, we'll always remember our man of the day.

For he made our lives happier in so many ways.  

Thanks Uncle Larry

I thank you for being in my life Dad for the short time you were. Just like Garth Brooks sang, I could have missed the pain, but then I would have missed the dance. 

I Love You Dad and someday I will see you again. 

         

Looking Back on 2013

            As I look back on 2013 I realize this has been a big transition in my life. At the beginning of the year I finished a log home and I took a couple months off doing small jobs. My partner by my side kristi has been a godsend to me not only helping me out but being a great figure in my childrens lives. Around the month of April went to trial for an assault charge on my ex wife. Anytime I was very anxious and very nervous about the outcome knowing and I was completely innocent there was always a chance the court system might see it differently. Doing the trial as I took the stand I realize how angry I was because of the lie that was told that I would actually harm a woman. I also wondered how two people that loved each other and took a vow of marriage could end up in court with false pretense. I was declared innocent and by the sound of the judge is not very happy that we were even in court for such an alleged assault.

             During the summer it was a tough time small jobs were still coming in little by little. Then one day in August as I was driving to my bank depositing money the teller told me that the old branch manager want to get ahold of me about building a deck and fencing in her back yard. Toward the end of the job the neighbor just so happen to walk  across the yard and talk to me. He spoke to me about that he was a general contractor and had some upcoming work if I was interested in some of it. I told him absolutely any also let me know that the work some of it was in Charlotte and there was a big project in Atlanta if I was interested.

              By the end of September I was in Atlanta remodeling bathrooms and supervising two additions on back of an assisted living community. Those two jobs ran from the end of Sept to the beginning of Christmas. The experience in Atlanta was pretty cool with living in the city I've never been to before and having the opportunity to have my children come down and I took them to the aquarium and the zoo while I was down there.

              To sum up 2013 I would have never realized that in a year from building log homes to being in Atlanta Georgia building an assisted living community. 2014 is looking like the best year in business. With all the job opportunities out there and potential projects on my plate including a log home in Banner Elk this year is setting up to be one of my best years ever. Something up the last two or three years of my life it has been a rough road the 2013 has truly been enjoyable and definitely has been one for the books. I didn't make a lot of money this year I kept my head above water I'm behind on some payments 2014 I'm here right now and I'm very excited to get this year going.

         

The right thing to do!

          Over the years I have been a person who has done something for someone or a group of people because it felt good to do. I do things sometimes to feed my soul, good deeds, helping someone do a task that maybe they are not able to do themselves or just saying something positive. I have been blessed with the ability both physically and mentally to perform many different task. Performing these tasks was taught to me by my family, friends, co-workers, coaches, you get the point. Whether these tasks or maybe even just saying something positive to someone who I could make their day a little brighter is good for the soul.

            This past week we all saw one of the most deadly Tornadoes in this countries history make its mark in Oklahoma. As I sat at home and watched the coverage, I felt obligated to help out in someway. I attacked the phone and Internet to see what I could do. My truck was half loaded and a plan of attack was on my mind to get to Oklahoma to help cleanup and rebuild. The thought that I could help these people out makes me feel good. Soul Food is what I call it and when soul is good then so is my life. Being a carpenter and building many different types of buildings, houses and restaurants has given me the ability to help people out with my skills. I have been blessed to be able to have these talents from my early years of my Dad owning a construction company. So as I sat and watched I realized that my service to Oklahoma begins now.

             I immediately got a response to my Craigslist ad I put up in Oklahoma City. The response was great and began emailing back and forth to a company who specializes in disaster relief. The company travels and has done work for Hurricane Katrina, Ike, Sandy, and many more disasters across the country. I am very excited about the opportunity to help the people of Oklahoma out. My whole demeanor in the last week is full of anticipation to get out there and get to rebuilding. Building homes for families is something I have done for years. The gratification of putting a roof over someones head is very rewarding. The best reward after a job is done is when years after I have built a home that  we go from Customer-Contractor relationship to a Friendship. Going to Oklahoma I don't need any recognition or award because my reward is the smiles on the families faces. In my years of building I never considered it a job. Our logo for my company was "Building Log Homes is not a job, It is a Lifestyle!" Thats how I have always thought of building and always will have. Most people don't have that in there life, I am blessed to have it!

            Rebuilding a town, community, and lifestyle is something I am so looking forward to in Oklahoma. I do hope everything works out that I am out there helping to rebuild. This is where faith comes in my life that I know God will put me where he needs me the most. My talent and hard work will put me in the right place for me and my kids. I build homes because of the love I have for the industry. I have never looked at how much money I could make or how big of a house I could live in or what neighborhood, or any of that other nonsense that people try to keep up with the "Joneses." The right thing in everbodies life is to use the God given talents that you possess. Whether it be a garbage man, senator, banker, or anything else just as long as you do it for the right reason. What I mean by that is most people get an occupation for the money not the love. Yes the money is good but if you are misserable then where is the gratification for your soul. Yes I have found my calling with what I do and I don't let anybody get in the way. You will have your critics but do they really know why you do something. I do it because it is a way of life for me and building for me is "The right thing to do for Oklahoma!"

The Meaning

                 I have decided to start blogging and I am not sure if this is the way most people do it but here it goes. Looking at where the world is today is very troubling for me. I am not only disgusted, embarassed, fed up, aggravated, mad, Pretty sure you get the point I am not sure we can fix it?  As of the last month there has been girls found after ten years in captivity, (UNDER OUR NOSES, MIND YOU). The IRS targeting groups of people for audits, four dead Americans in Benghazi, Gun Control, a sick fuckin abortion doctor, along with many more stories that I will cover in my blogs. I ask everybody including myself "How did we get here as a country and people?" Yes we can all point fingers and blame the next guy but I ask you can it be fixed? Thats an awesome question? How long would it take? What steps would you take? Are we just kidding ourselves? It really bothers me that there are people in this world who live in such a twisted world that I fear for my Kids. Should I make it a full time job to watch over my kids like the secret service does the president. Just kidding I am not that paranoid, Yet :). I wonder what God is thinking right now and wondering when he or she has had enough. My belief in God was born into me and along with my parents I know what is right and what is wrong. I am no angel by far and I know when I have done wrong but what about these people who do things like go into a school and unload on a bunch of kids(WTF). In my opinion I blame the parents expecially the mother who not only told the babysitter to watch your back with that kid but just got home from vacation the night before the nutjob went and did all this killing. If you know your kid is a little out there maybe you need to check your parenting skills. I can say that because I am a father and as much as I think I can control my kids I will at least know when something is wrong with them. BTW I am a father of twins (boy and girl) yes I hit it on the head. Further details on trajedies like this will follow.

                 I have always believed I am the king of common sense. For instance blaming a gun in Conneticut for killing all those kids is like blaming the train for jumping off the tracks last week also in Conneticut. If your a congressman or woman and you know the country is in a debt crisis and the economy is shit then maybe you should not take a raise for the cost of living that was a law made up by you (selfish bastards and bitches). You should also be ashamed of yourself and I am not sure how you could look yourself in the mirror. I can say all this stuff because I am a small business owner and I always make sure my people are paid even if I don't get paid. It's called responsibility and integrity to you dirtbags in Washington.

                 A little background on myself I have graduated from high school in 1992, went to college, played college basketball, high school basketball. I enlisted in the military and was discharged medically with a broken jaw. Been a lumberjack since I was a kid along with wearing a toolbelt since I could walk with my Dad's Company. Have had a gun in my hand since I was 7 and have hunted everyyear since, with deer mounts on the wall. I have had my share of losses from My Grandparents, Cousin, friends, neighbors, acquantinces but the biggest one was my Dad who Died when I was twenty suddenly and unexpected. I have also lost businesses wives, girlfriends, and been robbed, held at gunpoint, shot at, fought, never beat up, embarassed, and many more experiences in a tough ass world.  All of these experiences have made me self name myself the "King of Perseverance". I am proud of my life and the family, friends, people who have come and gone. Without these experiences I would not be "Big J", "Lumberjack" "John Wayne" or all the other nicknames I have. I am 6'5 240 and built log homes the last 8 years without a crane so thats where my nicknames have come from and yes not to many people fuck with me. I am a gentle giant but don't rattle me up and it does take a while to do that. I have also been arrested, jailed (Child Support, And a false assault charge which I was found not guilty of course). My life has been awesome and I am like a diesel truck and not even broke in yet.

           I plan on tackling the issues that are here amongst us now to looking back at my life in this blog. You could call it a memoir with my basics and common sense of life that most people don't have and do. I hope you enjoy my blogs and follow me for I have had a wonderful ride and smile everyday about it. It has not been easy but I would not have it anyother way. So strap in and enjoy the ride through the eyes of a Lumberjack. Btw the couple stories and life events I mentioned are just about 10% of the experiences that I have had.

Jason